Monsters

Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray the Lord my soul to keep
But tears keep leaking from my eyes
Just like the little child who hides
Those nightmares that I feared before
Always lurked behind a door
But now I’m grown enough to see
The monsters lie inside of me

There’s no escape, no way to run
Just let the monsters have their fun
Soon they’ll leave, the sun will shine
And then pretend that all is fine
But soon enough, back they’ll be
Never even warning me
So here I lie, curled in a ball
And hope they fade back in the wall

But free from them I’ll never be
For they are inside of me
Within the creases of my brain
The monsters come, and with them pain
I wish that I could end this curse
But wishing only makes it worse
So don’t be mad or sad for me
Help fight the monsters I can’t see

A Father’s Presence

From her cold numb hands
the flowers fall.
He only used her,
cared naught at all.
Standing in white,
she’s trying to fight,
the tears.
All words he said,
now fall dead,
on her ears.
She sinks to her knees,
and softly a breeze,
rustles her hair.
As rain starts to fall,
she sends up a call,
to her father.
Then through the rain,
and her fog of pain,
He comes.
Lifting her up,
wrapped in his love,
God holds his child,
and lets her cry.

Shocked Silence

Completely rough with no revisions.  I just wrote this after this morning… it was the quickest way to deal with the shock and confusion I experienced

I cower in my chair
The anger overwhelming
They all are sitting there
Pointing fingers
None are delving
To find the truth

“I don’t think it’s fair”
“would you all just listen”
“I have work to do”
So do we all
So do we all

I’m not asking for anything much
Just a slight consideration
If only one could touch
Their hearts
With a bit of satisfaction

We’re all in this together
But we tear each others throats
It’s amazing that a feather
Can tip
The balance of conversation

I reel in my thoughts
They should not be said
I’m not the boss
Of them
I’m just a volunteer

The shock is wearing
Thank goodness
For that
I thought it would never
leave

I’m Sorry, I can’t be your Princess

The tears threaten to spill
To show the world what’s inside
But I hold them back with iron will
None need see what lies within
They wouldn’t understand even if they did

I’m simple yet complexity
Soft but impenetrability
You try to help, but I regress
I’m not your damsel in distress

I wanted to be the knight
But my strength is never there
So I wait in hope with tears to fight
For someone to come riding here

Do I wait in vain? For someone who’s not there
Or is someone waiting for their cue
No matter the truth
I remain here
Hiding, crying, wishing
Someone would hear
And yet I want to be alone
So not to spread my misery
To those who live so happily
I cower in my corner
All Alone

Music Box

She twirled around the abandoned hall; her perfect, movements fluid.
The yellow fabric of her dress rustling with every movement.
She danced to music none could hear.
Upon her toes she pranced,
light, buoyant,
memory locked deep inside,
brought to the surface only by the music.
Like her dress, her dark hair flowed,
glowing, shimmering
with deep red hues in the low lighting.
Her waves tamed only by a small tiara upon her brow.
Her fingers loose,
free of any partner’s hand,
and still she danced,
unceasing as the music played on.

The child watched,
her brown hair flowing down her back,
she watched the red headed dancer spin,
blue eyes tracing the perfect form,
dreaming as the music plays.
But the music begins to slow,
coming to a halt.
The young child sighs and closes the lid,
stopping the music.
In the absence of the music,
the beautiful dancer collapses,
falling to the abandoned dance floor in a heap.
Small fingers turn the dial, winding it again.
Slowly, those fingers lift the lid once more,
reviving the dancer,
the music box continuing to play entrancing tones
as the young girl stares into it,
dreaming.